Swallowing my fears (literally), Ko Jum, Thailand

My time in the South of Thailand was spent on 5 islands and a little in the mainland, Krabi region, by the coast. This part of the trip is probably what my ma warned me about - all that 'hedonism', well I found it! This part of the country is not so much about the culture and more about the beaches, snorkelling and quite a lot of partying.

As soon as I arrived on the island of Ko Phi Phi, notorious for it's party scene, I wanted to leave. It smelt of a stale hangover. The tiny paved alleyways were crammed with shops of tacky souvenir T-Shirts and shorts. Every other shop was a waxing parlour, only to be outdone by the tattoo parlours, they legitmately seemed to match the number of bars on the island (i.e. a lot). The tattoo artists were always on hand to take advantage of the thousands of Westerners about to make the worst mistake of their lives when they stumble in drunk at 4am demanding a tattoo a pair of red lips on their arse (I met a girl who got this). Fast food stalls had pop ups everywhere to cater for the after-party munchies and while it made me cringe it was great to grab a cheap yet giant slice of pizza so easily.

The hostel was also pretty nasty, crammed full and relatively expensive for Thailand. You'd be lucky to get a pillow amd it was considered a flat-out abnormality if they gave you a sheet to sleep under. I guess the idea was that you didn't sleep here, that's what the beach was for during the day. At nights, you party. After my first night I knew I had to leave, although it was sad to say bye to the girls, Martha and Beth, I knew I'd be seeing them again on Koh Phangan.

I was told I'd enjoy Koh Lanta the most and I think it's fair to say, as an island, I did. It's made a real effort to maintain a calm and peaceful place with a few parties going on if you know where to find them. The beaches are vast and beautiful and mopeds are cheap and easy to rent and it was a great way to see beautiful scenery as you discover the island. It's green and lush with the ever-present dramatic backdrop of the sea. My new friend Cailin (left) and I spent a day exploring together and we met Hannah and Hannah and we found a party that night!

Not one for being away from my boys, George and Jordi had arrived on the island and soon we were a team again. I met the awesome Joe and Charly through them, a young couple from England.

We stayed in a couple of the more bizarre hostels I've stayed in. One was essentially an overgrown kids den/tree house built on sand, which was trying to pass off as a hostel. My 7 year old self would've given a sister up to be able to have that in her back garden but as it is now, I felt a bit squashed and also extremely on edge when people lit up inside...

I went caving, trekked through jungle, watched amazing sunsets and had unforgettable bike trips with the gang. I opted for the back George's bike first as he had his speaker ready in the drink holder to play tunes but I soon found out that driving the bike didn't stop him from busting a move, or several... So I climbed on the back of Jordi's. This one liked to sing loudly. Before I knew it, we were the von Trapp family singing 'Do-Re-Mi' at the top of our lungs but instead of Vienna and lots of steps we had Thai roads, jungle and our mopeds overtaking each other.

Next stop, Ko Jum.

Our own little island. Charly and Joe left to spend time with Charly's family and we decided to go off the beaten track. Ko Jum was an undiscovered tiny gem of an island. We got a ferry boat over there and expected to arrive on a dock and find a hostel from there, so we panicked slightly as the closer we got to the island we realised there was no dock...

Then the boat stopped in the middle of the sea and little long boats started rocking up demanding to know what resorts people were staying at, each resort had it's own boat and beach area. At the back of my brain I remembered skimming over names of resorts the day before when looking up info on the island, so with the boats about to pull away with our only access to the island I shouted out, 'PEACH PARADISE!!'

Waiting for a split second hoping that meant something to any one of the half dozen boats floating around the ferry...

'...you mean peace paradise?' One man asked. 'Sure, why not?' The other resort's long boats were now full of smug, savvy tourists but there was no one else on this man's long boat.. what did this mean?? Was it a dive? Was it a hut by the sea? Would he kidnap us and sell us as slaves and/or drug traffickers? The boys and I looked at each other, shrugged and decided to go with it, our choices were slim at this point.

We pulled up to an almost deserted beach, in front of us there was an adorable hammock and seashell filled wooden cafe three children came running up to help take our bags and woman who clearly ran the resort asked if she could help us.

'...we were just wondering if you had a accommodation for the three of us?' Like there was anywhere else we could go, this looked to be the only resort on the beach. 'Come this way.'

Our hut for the next two nights was similar to our Koh Rong abode. A single and a double, mosquito nets and a loo. But it was cheap and clean enough for us. The boys took the double like the old married couple they are.

We had an awesome chilled out few days there, it felt like our own private beach and the sun set spectacularly out behind the water.

One of the days was well spent on a boat trip snorkelling around Ko Phi Phi island, seeing it from this angle was something else entirely, away from the hoards inland, we saw why it originally became so popular, as well as the location for The Beach (an average/cultish 90s movie starring Leo DiCaprio).

One girl had little confidence in the water... we're not sure why she wore the snorkel, there was no chance of getting her head under with all that gear on. Below was my favourite, the most beautful little beach.

Only a slight hiccup in the entirely chilled out vibes was the time I (unintentionally) ate ants for my lunch. They came inside one of the two lettuce leaves served as a part of my garden salad (a few slices of tomatoes and cucumber in the middle). I discovered the ants halfway through eating the second leaf and if you know me at all or read the about me section of this blog, it clearly states my debilitating ant phobia, eating them probably comes just below enacting a live version of the human centipede as things I'd least like to do in my life.

I gagged. The boys laughed. I welled up. We argued whether or not to tell the manager/owner/waitress/cook - of course it was all the same woman - and whether or not I should pay for the meal.

It went like this 'you're on a bloody deserted island Eli, it's not going to be gourmet!'

'They have no money!'

And 'it's not like they have a health and safety checklist!'

But my point was plain and simple; I'm NOT paying for the bloody privilege of ingesting the one creature of have a freaking phobia of!

I told the Thai woman of a hundred roles. It was incredibly awkward and she didn't understand so I had to pretend to be an ant to get my point across. In the end I didn't pay. Jordi and I didn't speak for a few hours.

#kophiphi #kojum #thailand #travel #snorkelling #beach #kohlanta #ants